Ooh! Ooh! Paris Back in Jail!

Paris Hilton has been ordered back to jail after being released for "undisclosed medical reasons" following only 75 hours of incarceration. She's going back in.

This is crazy. I'm so disgusted by Paris Hilton's celebrity and media frenzy. I mean so far she's only famous for being famous. Everyone knows who she is, but everybody kind of looks at each other and says, "But what does she DO?" She parties. Publicly. She poses, she pouts, she tosses her hair, she shops, she frequents night clubs, she does stupid reality shows that are far from real I'm sure. And she drives drunk. Then she does it again. I'm not even sure exactly what it was that got her thrown in jail this time, but I think it was something about a third offense. It's Hollywood in Neverland. Young celebrities are so accustomed to star treatment, they actually begin to believe they're starring in their own real life movie, and they can do anything because somebody will fix it in the editing room. They have "people" for everything and they lose track of the idea that they're responsible for their own behavior. Someone will air-brush out the blemishes and edit out the mistakes.

All of which brings me to this question: why did I turn on the TV today and watch the whole stupid mess unfold? I never turn on the TV during the day. But today, I found myself watching Ms. Hilton being put into a police car at her home and being driven through a nasty swarm of paparrazzi back to the jail she was released from in the middle of the night last night. After seeing the same footage about a dozen times, and hearing the commentators speculate on whether she would be ordered back to jail for the remainder of her sentence, I shook my head in disgust and muted the TV, going back to the more important business of folding my laundry. Ah, but did you notice what I said? I said I MUTED it. But did I turn it OFF? NO! Every few minutes I would check back to see if she had arrived at the court house yet, what was going on. And after more speculation and comments from CNN legal consultants and anchors, I would shake my head in disgust and MUTE IT AGAIN! This went on pretty much all afternoon. I was hooked.

So what's the deal? Well, I realize that it's simply the fact that it's a spectacle. No, I don't care on any personal level whether Paris Hilton has to stay in jail for 45 days, or 23 days or overnight. But there are issues involved. It's infuriating to think that the rich and famous are treated differently than the rest of us. It's fascinating to hear how such a thing came to pass. It's gratifying to know that the judge who imposed her sentence was mad as hell at the Sheriff's department for letting her go because she felt a little faint. (That's my sarcasm. I don't really know how serious her "condition" was. Poor thing) And of course when you come right down to it, it's entertainment. Yeah that's right. I'm being honest. We experienced the same thing with O.J.'s famous slow speed chase and then his endless trial. We know it's serious business. People were murdered. But we just can't take our eyes off it. The Paris thing isn't even close to being that serious, but it could be. What if her drunk driving killed somebody? What if she really was on the verge of a nervous breakdown in that jail cell and going back in really does cause her serious harm. What if she died? That's why we keep watching. Not because we're hoping something bad will happen really, but if it does we don't want to miss it.

Well, the judge ordered her back to jail and of course her attorney filed an immediate appeal blah blah blah. They say it may be Monday before the appeal can be considered. So potentially there are two more whole days of speculation, sound bites, commentary, file tape of the crying handcuffed Paris shown split screen with the glam red carpet Paris. There's only one thing I find a little bit gratifying about it all. It's the ultimate reality TV show and Hollywood ain't making a dime.